Another friend going through chemo put it best when she said that sometimes it is hard to get your feet going in that direction, meaning the chemo room. I stalled as long as possible today - talking with a mom at the busstop, hanging out at Dawson's preschool, crying in my van, checking out the cancer center's library, until I was ready to go in. Someone asked if I need to be there by a certain time. I told them I sort of do but they can't get started until I get there.
My white blood cell count was low yesterday, almost the lowest it has been through these cycles, which means that nasty shot on Friday. Last cycle, the pain hit hard on the Sunday following the treatment and I am supposed to do the Wilmington Making Strides this Sunday. Dave talked about pushing me in a wheelchair or I could always kick my kids out of the stroller!
The chemo room was filled with some sad stories today - the volunteer dog who visits on Thursdays was hit by a car (it looks like he will be okay but how is that news supposed to lift our spirits? Lie to me next time!) , a woman younger than me was supposed to get married last weekend and is instead getting chemo when she should have been on her honeymoon, and another woman's cell counts have been too low for weeks to get chemo.
Before today, I was enjoying a good week - went out with some friends, got some new hats (which I am getting tons of compliments from them), got some new makeup that actually makes me look healthy, and just had some good times with my family. Tomorrow night, I am going with some friends to see Robin Roberts speak at the DuPont Theater. My joys will walk through the door with Dave within the next 30 minutes or so and give me big squeezes. I just love the look on their faces when they haven't seen me all day. It's one of those things I wish I could bottle up and keep forever.
BTW - 1 week from now, Dave and I will be packing the final supplies for our 3-day walk!
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5 comments:
I so appreciate your blogs, Barbara. You are so real (and funny...:) Thank you for sharing. May the shot be kinder to your body this time. Enjoy those big smiles and hugs soon to arrive. Thank you for reminding me to enjoy them as well.
Jill
Wow! I can't believe the 3-day is almost here. How exciting! And enjoy Robin Roberts tomorrow night! :)
I thought of you the other day when Robin Roberts talked about her book and her journey this past year. She talked about her decision to let others in on her journey, and I thought about how you have in your own way let us in on your journey. Thank you! Enjoy her tomorrow night.
Bridget
I enjoy reading your blogs, your honesty and humor is great! Hope you enjoyed the hugs you recieved this afternoon, the hugs and kisses of children is often the best "medicine"!
--Kendra
Try to keep positive, you have accomplished so much. Have fun out listening to Robin Roberts, I love GMA, and just admire all people who are so open about the trials of cancer. It is good to let out the good and the bad.
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